So, it’s nearly time for the most exciting and unpredictable vote in years. Yes, the Eurovision Song Contest is almost upon us! As a nice little warm up though, there’s also the small matter of a General Election. When you think about it there’s actually quite a lot of similarities between the two. No really, bear with me here!
No-one really is totally keen on any of the choices available, the whole process goes on a bit too long and the voting system is just a bit suspect.
The similarities don’t stop there either. This campaign, even putting aside the personal attacks, right wing media hatchet jobs and social media trends has seen the emergence of a threat from a land far away. Scotland.
Nicola Sturgeon’s SNP has given everybody a bit of a scare. Likely to stamp across the Labour vote in their home territory and vilified as potentially bringing down democracy in Britain as we know it by those on the right, Sturgeon has been the breakout star of this campaign. Say it quietly but there are plenty of voters on the left and South of the Border who wish they could vote for her. Ssssshhhhhh!!! That was off message wasn’t it? The message is actually the democratic process in Scotland as a part of the United Kingdom (I know they stayed with us – No, they really did!) will spell CONSTITUTIONAL ARMAGEDDON!!! Democracy is clearly a dangerous thing.
This year’s Eurovision sees a special guest entrant, this time from the South, but also from a far away land. Australia.
Eurovision purists aren’t happy. Australia have always had a strong link and affection for the competition throughout its 60 year history. This year, to mark the 60th anniversary Australia have been given a one-off ticket to compete in the final. Hang on a minute though! They’ve actually entered a decent song which might actually win! Europeans everywhere might actually vote for it. Hardly fair that is it? Asked to enter a competition and actually trying to win it? Especially as Australia isn’t in Europe (who knew?) and what would happen if they do indeed win this year’s contest? Europe would be held to ransom by a non-European country. Not only would the Eurovision constitution descend into chaos, Australia, as winners would demand the winner’s right to defend their title in 2016. Europe might actually have to hold their own competition in Australia. What nonsense would that be? EUROVISIONAL ARMAGEDDON!!! Democracy once again proving itself unreliable and downright dangerous.